Walking Dead:
For the record, this is one of my favorite shows. I have read every chapter of the graphic novels, as well as Rise of the Governor. I know the Walking Dead. And Senator, these were not Walkers...
Orlando has done some spectacular Zombie houses in the past. Deadtropolis and Zombiegeddon. The latter was a humorous house that is still a huge fan favorite. In those houses, the zombies did no behave like Walkers. Why should they? We know zombies come in all personalities Some are slow. Others run. Some even show intelligence. Sine there were no preconceived "rules" for the zombies in Deadtropolis or Zombiegeddon, who is to say they are not "behaving properly"? I was immersed i whatever world the creators made and I loved it.
But when you rent the Walking Dead IP, by God, your zombies need to behave in a certain way. That's one thing I hate about IP. Your walkers can only do one thing, or else they are not walkers. So, imagine my utter shock when I walked through each of these houses and heard walkers growl, breathe in my ear, bark, and even cat-call. They lunged out lightning quick just like any other scarector, and then reset in a non-walker fashion. Outside in the streets, I saw a walker carrying a leg slung over his shoulder like a baseball bat. His "walker scare" was to grab the leg and half swing it at you. Can anyone point me to the episode where a walker uses a weapon? I'd really be interested in seeing that one.
I don't want to hear that I'm nitpicking. These scareactors should have immediately been removed from their post and asked to watch a WD marathon or not return. We all know that talent makes or breaks a house. These bozos broke it.
What about the sets?
Orlando's had a hodge-podge of sets from the series. It seemed to be an easter egg hunt for WD fanboys, as there was a lot of hidden things to see. I don't see the purpose of that, really. Whatever. The problem I had is that it took four times through the house to even realize you were, say, supposed to be on the roof, and the easter egg was Merle's hand and a hacksaw.
What was good at Orlando:
SOME of the scares were set up as obstacles blocking walkers. This is the way to do this, people! Walkers can lash out at you continually and there's no need to do a non-walker RESET.
The barn looked and felt like a barn (Hollywood's sucked)
They had a Winnebago.
They had a "scarezone" out front
What was good at Hollywood:
The facade was actually BETTER than Orlando's
They had a TANK!
They had bicycle-girl (Orlando claimed the prop never arrived)
They had the Well-walker (Again, the prop never arrived at Orlando)
They had the Terror Tram tie in
They had survivor camps (none in Orlando)
The smells were more real than Orlando's
Hollywood: C- (because of crappy walkers)
Orlando: D+ (because of crappy walkers)
I won't really go into Terror Tram, except to say ti was VASTLY improved from prior years.
Grade: B
Now for the original stuff:
La Llorona:
We were promised a much scarier ending and by God, he delivered. The ending was truly gruesome and I loved it.
Grade: B- (would have been A+ had this not been a FREAKING REPEAT)
Chainsaw Massacre:
I've heard so many people talk about how intense and wonderful this was. It was still not a hell of a lot different than 2007. I don't understand why this was brought back. Yeah, it looked nice. Yeah, it smelled terrible. Yeah, it was brutal. BUT I SAW IT BACK IN 2007.....again a year or two later. I mean, WHY?
Grade: F (it's bad enough when Hollywood repeats things. It's worse when they bring back the exact same stuff years later) I will NOT change this grade. This should have never had been brought back. Period. It was lazy.
I LOVED most of the Orlando houses I have ever been through. As much as I loved them, I never want to see them again. Give me NEW things.
Now, for Orlando's original stuff:
Penn & Teller Nuke'd Las Vegas in 3D:
So, I'm not a big 3D fan (but Orlando's 3D maze In Between last year was about the best I've ever seen).
I AM a huge Penn & Teller fan, though. As such, this was the house I was most anticipating. It was clearly going to be the humor house for Orlando this year. For the past 5 or so years, the humor house has never failed to deliver.
While this house was technically "IP" the word is that Penn & Teller (like Alice Cooper) did not have strict contractual limitations. Alice was by fat the most laid back, not really overseeing anything. I don' think he even visited the Orlando house, as he was on your out of the country. Penn & Teller likewise had no real contractual limitations, BUT they did want to be involved every step of the design. Unlike other sponsors, who conduct meetings over the phone, P&T would actually fly out to Orlando every time they wanted to discuss an idea. While they came armed with specific ideas, the creative team at Universal explained why or why not something would work, or how it would work better. The process was incredibly smooth and P&T were supposedly a pleasure to work with. THIS is IP I can live with. The creative team gets to be as creative as they want to be. No hands are tied. The goal is to entertain the customers - not protect the IP.
Here's the incredible part - P&T actually attended opening night and did a set in their own house. The day after I left for California, they came back and did the entire night. That's amazing.
The house has the following backstory: P&T perform a "bullet catch" act (this is true). They decided to use nuclear warheads one night instead of bullets. Vegas became a radioactive wasteland. They constructed a tent over the entire city (the maze is housed in a tent). P&T wanted to make the most of it, so they are re-opening the city as a tourist attraction. As they have run out of radiation suits, you are provided with radiation shields (3D glasses) that will protect you.
The house winds its way through all of the regular Vegas-like things. Casino, buffet, wedding chapel, hotel room, etc. You see various oddities along the way, all thanks to the radiation: your BJ dealer has three breasts, the bride-groom have been welded together by radiation. There are many hidden "buttons" that when pushed produce some sort of effect. For instance, as you walk through the buffet, you are assaulted with many sensations - smells, water blasts, vibrating floor, etc. Behind the buffet is a mirror where you see your own reactions. As you round the corner, you see a line of buttons on a control panel....and can see that the mirror was two-way. You can see where you just were - and all of the people who were in your position. As you press various buttons, they trigger the things that happened to you. One of the buttons actually triggers a water spray right back at you, though. A trick within a trick.
It's most definitely a fun house. Throughout, you hear Penn making wise-cracks continually. At the very end, you hear (and see) P&T say that you made it out - at least there were no clowns - at which time clowns burst out of the walls at you. The story behind this is that Teller HATES clowns. His E-mail is even
[email protected] Universal insisted that they needed clowns because it's a Vegas house and clowns always work well in houses. P&T agreed to have clowns, but it had to be on their terms. They essentially designed this last scare.
Grade: B+ (not as good as any of the previous 5 humor houses - those were all A)
Dead End:
This is in a sound stage. Absolutely freaking beautiful house.
The backstory is based LOOSELY on "The Appirition". The story there is about a group of researchers who tried to summon a spirit by focusing on it. As they invented details about the spirit, those details became reality. In Dead End, the story centers around a house in which loved a husband and wife. He was a photographer and she was a seamstress. They were wholly unremarkable people and lived a good life. They both died of natural causes in the house. There were no ghosts, no murders, nothing like that. The house was owned by a bank and saw unoccipied and forgotten for many years. It fell into decay and became known by kids as the haunted house on the street. Kids began to make up stoies about the couple who lived there. He became known as the man who lured people into the house, killed them, and took photos of them for his sick pleasure. She became known as the woman who kept girls prisoners, turning them into her own living dolls. As the fale tales grew in complexity, kids in the neighborhood dared each other to go close rto the house. At Halloween, they would dare each other to leave a Jack O Lantern on the doorstep. The dares became more intense - sneak inside, or stay the night inside the house. Eventually, kids started disappearing. The legends grew even more intense. The townspeople, not believing the house could be involved, removed the front door to remove the temptation of breaking in. They invited the public to go into the house, which is why you are there...
In the house you discover that all of the legends that the kids invented have essentially materialized. You discover many of the people who disappeared as a result of entering the house.
Among the amazing effects:
* As you enter the house, you see a ghostly girl ascending the stairs. As you pass the stairs, you hear her falling down them and a sick crack. You see her now hideously twisted neck. This is an amzong costume.
* You enter a plain, long hallway. Halfway throiugh, the lights flicker out and the scrim walls and ceiling disappear, with a Vortex tunnel toirling around you. BEST use of a Vortex in a long time.
* There are two Pepper's ghosts in this house. One is a projection of a ghostly girl dancing.
The other is the same girls dancing - only to pop out at you in person.
* There is a garden room that uses a mirror ro make the room look longer. The mirror hides a scareactor that pops out. This is a HUGELY effective scare, as he appears out of nowhere. The room also has a scareactor camoflauged as a dead vine.
* There is a bathroom scene with a bloated body in a tub. Two drop panels on the walls hide actors - one being a scaractor version of the dead girl. It's a great one-two punch.
* In the attic, there is a mirror at the end of the room. As you approach, a ghostly image appears a'la two-way mirror. As you are trying to make out the image, a scareactor LEAPS up and out - right in your face. Startling as hell. Got me every time. She rocks!
* In the finale room, you have essentially lost your mind and cannot tell reality anymore. This is represented by the room being on its side. You enter the room and the bed is on the wall. A ghostly projection of the wife of the house appears on the white sheets. It morphs into a demon like creature. At that instant, a hand reaches out from "under" the bed.
Geade: A. Original house is what Orlando does better than anyone else. Imagine all of the houses being this good. Welcome to last year....
Gothic:
My God. This soundstage house is the BEST HHN house I have EVER seen any any HHN (either coast). As I told Universal in my survey, it was the moist perfect HHN house ever. Detail was unsurpassed, as were the special effects.
Story is very simple: You are visiting the Catherral de Caementum, which is undergoing a rennovation. The facade is the Catherdral entrance, and scaffolds with tools and partially dismantled fratures. As you are probably aware, Cathedrals typically features gargoyles. - winged creatures fashioned after animals (monkey, bat, lion, etc). During the daytime, the rennovations take place. During the night, the gargoyles are highly protective of their home and they do NOT appreciate what is going on. You are visitng at night, and the gargoyles are here to scare you away. Note I said "scare". They are not here to dismember you - just to scare you off. This is not a gore house (nor was Dead End).
What is so great about this house is the scares. Every single actor wears an incredibly elaborate gargoyle costume. They look exactly like stone until they move. Eachand every costume is different also. They are modeled after different animals.
The effects are outstanding. We have seen Universal pull these off before, but not so many in one house before.
* The "Candle Room". This is the most beautiful HHN room I have ever seen. It was a labor of love. You walk down a hallway of the cathedral and candles line either side. Must be 150 on each side. They all flicker randomly. Above you (about 12 feet) is a gargoyle statue perched at the edge of one of the walls. As you walk down the hall, the candles blow out - from one end of the hall (behind you) toward the front (ahead of you). It's as if a huge gust came into the room from behind you. When the last candle flickers out, the gargoyle above leaps and "flies" overhead from one wall to the other. This is a span of at least 10 feet. He slowly flaps his wings as he flies overhead.
* A 7 foot gargoyle directly ahead of you at the end of a hall comed to life and rises to over 10 feet above you. This is a scareactor.
* Near the end of the house, you find yourself at the top of the catherdral. You know you are at the top, ad you look down through a window and see a huge chapel directly below you. The room is massive and must be 30 feet below. This is done with a set of mirrors (the chapel is actually hanging upside down next to you). You look down into the mirror and see the chapel "below" which is actually far above.
* You wal out into the night air, still on the roof of the cathedral. You see stars in the sky. A gargoyle appears from one side well over 10 feet above you anf flies 30 feet across the night sky. Amazing effect.
* The final scare is that you are looking through an archway and see a gargoyle that must be 50 feet away. He is dimly lit. The light flickers out and a second later the gargoyle is flying directly at you. It actually passes through the window and inch ir so away from you, then recedes back.
Grade: A+++
Overall park grades for 2012
Hollywood: C+ No truly stand out houses other than La Llorona (which is a repeat). IP houses suck hard. Terror Tram and HoH are amazingly better than prior years. Show is best in years. Compared to last year, this is really not good.
Orlando: C- Non IP houses were very good - Original houses were stellar. IP houses sucked hard. Lack of scarezones was AWFUL. Worst shows in years. So, basically, the ONLY "HHN Orlando quality" things this year were the two original houses and the female chainsaw team. The rest was either terrible or just ok. Last year was a home run. This is a foul ball.